What did you say?!?

As I've posted before I'm not big on cussing. The other night Butchy and I were having a conversation about this gal at my new job. She's.....uhmmm.....well.....she's a challenge. That works. I don't want to get dooced. When talking about her to Butchy I didn't have to censor my words....I was just letting the frustration flow. Towards the end of the conversation I summed up my feelings with, "she's just a futher-mucker!" My brain was saying something a little different. My mouth is obviously dyslexic.

Fired!

I'VE HAD ENOUGH! I'M FED UP WITH ALL THE CRAP! NO MORE!! ENOUGH IS ENOUGH!!! I'M DONE!! HALOSCAN YOU'RE OUTTA HERE!!!

What a crappy comment proggie! It slows my blog's loading time down to forever and a day....it never displays the correct number of comments.....it catagorizes some of my favorite commenters as spam.....IT SUCKS!!!

I've gone through and saved all the comments that Haloscan was storing in its stupid holding tank to a Word document...there's some good stuff in those comments! Blogger is where I'm going to stay for my commenting needs.....I'm sooooo glad I didn't switch Yay-Yays to Haloscan! Did I mention that Haloscan sucks balut? (pronounced: ball-oot) It also sucks dirty ass....no link for that one....sorry for the visual.

Ok...over Haloscan...on to something that actually works.......

Nothing

Don't you just love taking the time to open someone's blog...reading their most recent post....and having it be all about how they have nothing to say? Especially, when they go on and on and on about...well...nothing!?! Those are the best. I just LOVE reading about nothing. Didn't they make a show about nothing and call it Seinfeld? I know it was a big hit...but, I'm pretty sure that's cuz it was about a little more than nothing. Isn't a little more than nothing something?

I got nothing.

Job Update

I GOT THE JOB!!!
WOO HOO!!!
YAY!!!
I'll be getting more details tomorrow.

Just that kind of day....

Rachael, How could you?

I'm so disappointed! I've been watching Rachael Ray on the Food Network...thought she was a cutie...a little too girly for my taste, but...she still had a Tomboy thing going for her, which kept my interest piqued. I made the mistake of clicking on a link in one of my Daily Blogations...this is what I found:

I know, you're as disappointed as I am! When Tomboys Go Girly.....it's just sad.

Long Hair & Spiders

From reading the title y'all probably have a visual of a spider caught in long hair....and if you didn't before, I bet you do now! That's not at all the point of this post.

I have long hair...it's down to my butt. It's very thick...yet it doesn't look thick. Each hair strand is almost the same strength as dental floss....I have actually used my hair to floss my teeth, when I couldn't find any.

Here's where spiders come into it....having a lot of hair makes it difficult to keep track of every strand....they like to go off on their own sometimes. I cannot begin to count the number of times I've seen a hair out of the corner of my eye or had a strand tickle my arm and jumped outta my skin thinking it was a spider! When I started growing my hair out I was constantly jumping cuz I wasn't used to seeing my hair on my shoulder...now I'm jumping cuz I have spiders tickling my butt, the back of my arms, etc.....can you tell I HATE spiders?

So, you're wondering, "why is she posting about this now, right?" Cuz I had a spider walking down the back of my arm!! For once....meaning the very first time EVER....I thought, "oh, it's just my hair!" NOPE!! It was a spider!!! ACK!!!

Allergies & Heaving Infections

From reading previous posts y'all know that I have seasonal allergies. In the past my allergies have triggered a sinus infection that became so severe it blew out my left eardrum. So, it's allergy season, again. woo hoo. I've been dealing with all the joys of sneezing, coughing, watery-itchy eyes....you know, all the stuff they make Visine &/or Nyquil for. I've been popping Zyrtec-D's like candy...when I remember I have them, I think memory loss is a result of having a head full of snot. Your head can either be full of wonderful memories, or snot...not both. My head has chosen snot, for reasons that are only obvious to my sinuses.

I had a Dr appt on Weds. In the midst of discussing my pit rash I bring up how my allergies are kicking my ass. Dr Jonna takes a look in my ears and throat....molests my lymph nodes and then has the audacity to press on my sinuses! Good thing I like her....I wanted to whap her a good one. That hurt!

Verdict: sinus infection....AGAIN!! Why can't I be like normal people with seasonal allergies and just get allergy symptoms instead of needing horse-pill-sized antibiotics? Don't get me started on the "fluid" in my ears.....grrrrrrr! At least, this time I didn't go a year saying it was "just allergies" and then have my eardrum blow. The girl is getting smarter and smarter.

This time around has been a little different, though. I have nausea like you wouldn't believe....Dr Jonna agreed with me that it is probably from all the post nasal shit (mine don't drip...it flows!). Are you nauseated now, too? Good! I don't want to heave alone.

Group Interview....also seen on Sister-Friends

I'm NOT a fan of the group interview! Oh, the pressure! I'm an outgoing confident 38-year old woman....I was in this interview with 4 gals who are just out of High School and a gal who was around my age who told us that her weakness is allowing people to walk all over her. She was always the last one to answer....I started waiting her out so that she wouldn't always be the last one. I have this thing when I'm around spineless-wonders....I loan them my spine. They may not even want it, or for that matter even realize what I'm doing, but I try to bolster them. I'm big on protecting the underdog or speaking for those that have a hard time getting heard.

It wasn't planned, but I ended up sitting smack dab in the middle of these gals. I was directly across from the 2 managers that were interviewing us. They had us on one side of the long table while they faced us from the other side. I'm HUGE on eye contact in an interview setting, I think this kind of intimidated one of the managers. He kept averting his eyes whenever I was attempting make eye contact with him. I only strove for eye contact when I was answering one of their lame ass questions.

At the end of the interview they asked us if we had any questions for them....after a couple gals asked about topics they had already covered extensively, I asked how many positions they were filling. 15....I thought, "cool, there's 6 of us here," I knew they had already done another group interview with 6 earlier in the day....so 15 positions....12 interviewed so far...pretty good odds....then she had to add, "we've already filled 1/2." Great, now there's only 7 or 8 positions available and 12 potentials. Not so great odds....

After having a one-on-one interview, when I leave I usually know if I connected with the interviewer and had a good feeling about whether, or not, I got the job. You just don't get that at a group interview. It sucks!

I may not find out if I'm going to be "made an offer" until Tues....my tummy is already feeling the stress...along with my neck, head, shoulders, etc. Goddess, I wish I had a crystal ball!

Job Update

So, this morning was my phone interview....basically it was Dixie (who works for an independent company out of Seattle that does all the hiring for BoA) telling me what the job required and seeing if I was still interested. I am, so she told me to be back out in b.f.e. (bum-flippin'-Egypt) for a 4:00 pm group interview. BoA is about 1/2 an hour away from where I live. I take Interstate 90 all the way there.

I've never been in a group interview before, so I asked her how it worked. I guess, a group of potential employees sits around a table interacting and answering questions. They are really BIG on teamwork and group stuff at this facility. I don't quite get it since it's an inbound call center...no sales involved...and you're on the phone for 99% of your shift. If you're on the phone with clients....where does the teamwork come into play? Are we gonna tackle a rival call center over who gets to take the calls? I just find that odd. I'm all for being a team player....I just don't get how that will enhance my experience answering stupid questions 8 hours a day.

So...group interview: 4pm It feels like it's 150 degrees out (in Spokane that translates to around 95.....it's a dry heat)....can I call in "hot?" I guess you shouldn't call in until after you have a job to call in to, huh?!? I swear one of those big pharmaceutical companies needs to come up with a pill that will drop body temps.....on a hot sweltering day you take a pill and it feels like it's a nice 70 degrees out, rather than 100. I bet that would sell even more than Viagra! Who wants a hard on...or to be near a hard on....in 100 degree heat? Not that I ever want to be near one.... Now those cooling pills....I'm all for that!

Passed!

I got the news today I passed the assessment....now I'm waiting to hear back about when they want to set up the phone interview. I give good phone, so I'm not really stressin' over it. If I pass the phone interview, the next step is an in-person interview with one of the managers in the department I'd be working in. I'm not really stressin' about that, either. Heck! I'm not stressin' about nothin' at the moment. You'd think I found some valium underneath the couch cushion....nope, just chillin' like a villain. I am cranky, though. That could be because it's flippin' hot out and I was out driving with the rest of the crankies.....amazing how contagious the crankies are. I need a cranky-innoculation. I'd settle for a shot of vodka...too bad I'm not a drinker.

Job Interview

I have a job assessment/interview with Bank of America tomorrow at 9:30am. Should be interesting.....now to get myself back into work mode. I'll have to wear something other than a T-shirt...my body may go into T-shirt withdrawals. Do ya think my allergies will cooperate? I know, prob'ly not.....I can hope though, can't I?

Death by Intolerance

Found this article while surfing....it makes me sick. There are lifestyles that cause me to feel uncomfortable, but I'm not gonna kill a child just cuz they might grow up to be a right-wing fundamentalist. I have more common sense than that. This country is making me tired.

We have become what our forefathers were fleeing from! The history books say that the pilgrims came here for religious freedom....that's not completely true, but anyway....so we love to say that America is all about religious freedom. All that religious freedom means to most Americans is the right to discriminate! Our forefathers didn't want religion governing their new country...that was the problem they had with England. Now the religious right is governing our country....so where does the new generation of pilgrims go? Back to England?

Seen at Wal*Mart

I spent some quality time in the potty at W*M tonight. While sitting on the potty wishing for graffiti on the walls so that I would have something to read, I noticed there was some writing on the plate that holds the slidey bar thing to the door....I had to lean forward so that I could read the etched print......

Yes, it says Hiny Hiders.
Now that's class!

I spent the rest of my time on the potty wishing I had brought my camera in with me.....then I started wondering how I would explain the flash going off in the stall....then I had to poop some more.....such is my life.

Dub's Dom

I had a dream the other night I was making out with the President. It wasn't some gorgeous face on G Dubs body...nope it was him in all his redneckedness. Hey! Just cuz a guy wears a suit and lives in a big white house doesn't make him any less redneck! That boy is the King of All Rednecks....we, unfortunately, have to call him "President." Anyway...back to my dream.....

It started with me rubbing his shoulders. In my dream I was noticing how huge his shoulder pads were under his suit jacket. I started wondering if underneath the suit this guy was a scrawny little chicken-legged geek. He kept trying to pull me around in front of him and I kept moving away from him. He was continuously talking about how much he wanted to kiss me and I kept thinking, "I don't want that stupid mouth on me!" It was my hope that the SS guy outside the door would interrupt us with some kind of a national emergency. That didn't happen....where's a national emergency when you need one? So, G Dub keeps pawing at me....I then recall the days when I was living my life as a straightish woman...I knew to give a guy what he wants. It will only take about 5 minutes and the rest of the night is mine to do with what I want. It's the best way to get them off your ass. They're not whiney/pouty for not getting their way & you have peace and quiet for the rest of the night.....unless you come across one of those guys that has to talk about how manly he is and how good he is & blah blah blah. Nothing is worse than hearing a guy talk about how wonderful he is when it was a quickie and all you got out of it was a mess, a cramp in your thigh & rug burn. Yeah, really rocked my world, Speedy.

With that thought in mind, I did what I had to do to shut Dub's trap and get this ordeal over with. I thought I'd have a little fun and made him call me President Kat. I figured I'd tell him what to say and then I wouldn't have to hear his stupid babbling. Oh yeah, I dom'd the Prez...and it was good! He was my Bitch that night! Instead of giving him his way....he got mine! I rode him like a pony around the oval office, whipping his boxer'd ass.....he was wearing those sock suspenders on his scrawny chicken legs, too! I determined that if I had to be here "serving my country" then I was gonna give the SS one helluva show....I just hoped they could keep their laughter down.

After dom'ing Dub, like the bitch we know he is (I'm convinced Laura is a dominatrix!)...I made him get himself off. No way was I gonna touch the Prez's peenie! He was crying like a baby, thanking me for being such a patriot. Oh yeah, that's me...Ms Patriotic Dom. Thankfully, I woke up and it was only a nightmare. I'm still gay...and, he's still a redneck bitch.

Creative Cussing

I'm not a cusserer. That doesn't mean I don't cuss....it means I don't cuss as part of my regular speech pattern. My every other word isn't a cuss word.....I save cussing for moments when I'm seriously pissed or hurt. Even in those moments I, in my creative genius style, endeavor to cuss creatively. I love making up cuss words!

One of my favorite cuss-phrases is "Holy Mother Pheasant Plucker!" It just sounds naughty. "Holy Mother of God!" Is another one of my faves. When I really wanna sound naughty "gadammofosumbtch" works just fine....I'm not really saying anything, but it sure sounds like it!

I was raised that cussing was a sign of a small mind living in a trailer park. People of class don't cuss. I wasn't allowed to say, "butt, cops, or oh God!" Yes, cops....my parents felt it was like calling them pigs.....that's changed over the years. But saying God's name in vain....no, that hasn't changed...that's as bad as, if not worse than, saying the f-word! So for years "good.....ness!" was my "oh, God!"

I'm sure I have a lot more phrases that I use as cuss-phrases, I just can't think of them right now.....I need chocolate.....must have chocolate.

Man Boobs

I came across this article and thought, "they probably arrested him cuz the cops got turned on!" Someone needs to invent a Man-Bra....wait, wouldn't that be a sports bra? I'm surprised a guy with major man boobies would go out in public without a shirt on. What is the world coming to? What's next women with itty bitties taking off their shirts in public? Oh! The outrage!

Where are my binoculars when I need them?

New Blog

There's a new blog in town! It's a blog for, about and by women. Inspired by the book Divine Secrets of the Ya-Ya Sisterhood, it is my goal to create a blog where friendships with other women are made and celebrated. Take a look at our blog and see if it's where you belong!

First comes the shock....

There is an incredible essay I came across today in reaction to the bombings in London. It was written by Innocent Bystander. Please take the time to read it on his blog, or on my R, W & R page.

Funk Escape

I'm pulling out of my funk. I've medicated myself with chocolate, Diet Coke & reading all my favorite blogs......let the party begin! Actually, I think I'm gonna go curl up in bed with my latest book and my Baby Boy....if he'll wake up from his nap long enough to move to the bed! LOL

Hugs, y'all!

Horrible Day

I hate anniversaries. Not all anniversaries, just anniversaries of horrible events. Today is one of those type of anniversaries for me.

4 years ago today my cat, Baby Girl, was attacked by 2 dogs. Baby Girl had been mine for almost 5 years by this time. When I adopted her she was a skittish frightened little puff ball. She was born into a house full of monster-kids and parents who just didn't give a rip. As long as the monsters weren't bothering the adults....messing with their highs, buzzes & whatever else that was more important than raising well-behaved happy kids..... Part of not messing with the adults was terrorizing the kittens, Baby Girl included. I knew when I "rescued her from the pit of hell" that it would take a long time before she trusted me. In fact, I wasn't sure she ever would. That was ok with me, I just wanted her safe.

To say I was protective of her is a gross understatement. I wasn't a hovering suffocating kitty-mama.....I was just very aware of how she was treated by my friends & their children. If a friend allowed their child to chase &/or terrorize my BG (after I had made a request, or 10, for their child to leave her alone) the visit was cut short and they were not welcome in my home. That showed me they didn't respect me or my home. Bye-bye!

BG and I bonded....but it took about a year. She came to me, on her terms and I was fine with that. I earned her trust and she was won over by my love. She was my heart-kitty.

A neighbor rescued her from the 2 dogs. My ex had my car and refused to let me take her to the vet. I called my best friend, Misty. Misty arrived as fast as her little putt-putt car could get her to my place. On the way to the vet BG was in a 1/2 box....needing something to chew on she chose my eye glasses that were in the box next to her. I was in shock and didn't care about my glasses, Misty suggested I give her my leather wallet. Still not caring, I switched the glasses with my wallet. I still have those chewed on glasses and wallet. I was still wearing those glasses until recently when the ear piece broke.....I had many offers to buffer out the scratches, I never let anyone touch them.

The vet was wonderful with BG. There were no broken bones, but they wanted to keep her overnight. My fog was still far from lifting and I left BG at the vet's. This is one of the biggest regrets of my life. She was terrified. She needed to be with me. If I could turn back time, I would have taken her home with me.

Waiting for the vet's office to open the next morning was torture. I waited until 10 minutes after their opening hour and then called to check up on BG. The vet came on the line and told me that BG had died while they were examining her. Their best guess was that she had a heart attack. She was literally scared to death.

I should have brought her home with me. In my heart, I'm convinced that if I had she wouldn't have died. My only comfort is that she's no longer in any pain, she's free from fear and I will be with her again.

Now you know the biggest regret of my life.

"Lysol" ad...for Burfica

For those that weren't able to read the wonders of douching with "Lysol".....here's the large print version.

"Lysol" ad...large print

PS: I realized after posting this that my personalizing it for Burfica might make it sound like I was hinting that she needed to use the product....that's sooooo not the case! Well, not as far as I know. She's in TX & I'm in WA....so there's really no way I could know that she needs to use the product. Unless, of course, her sister Alekx said anything to me....which she didn't. That would just be wrong! And mean, too! I just don't see Alekx being that kind of person....not that I know her very well, or anything. She could easily be exactly that type of person and I would never know. She sounds so nice on her blog....well...she did tell my other Bloggin' Buds "Ha Eat dirt folks..I'm at the top of the link list." Hmmmm....maybe she is an evil meanie. Well, even if she is a minion of Evil Emus she never said a word to me about Burf's hygeine. Therefore, I'm confident that Burf is fresh as a flower.......now, where was I going with all this?

Oh, right! To make a long explanation even longer: I was personalizing it for Burf cuz she's in TX on her sister Alekx's "stupid tiny ass computer" and wasn't able to read the ad. Did that clear up your confusion?

See no evil

Do we really need to know this? Is this information really necessary for me to have? Will my life be better for knowing? Who really gives a crap about this? I can see it being information that a future lover would want to know....but ME? Do I NEED to know??? I DON'T THINK SO!!

Great, now I've got the heeby-jeebies!