Pain

I've been in toothache hell for the last 2 - 3 months...I had a tooth pulled to stop the pain...turns out it wasn't the tooth causing the intense pain. Yep...wrong tooth! I'm taking lots of drugs...if I want to be almost pain-free I have to take vicodin with a muscle relaxant and 1,000 mgs of ibuprofen...that lasts for almost a full hour...if I just take 1200 mgs of ibuprofen then it only lasts 1/2 hour...I have missed a lot of work because of the pain. My dental insurance starts tomorrow....everything up to now has been at my expense....almost $500! My Dentist can't figure out why I'm still in such extreme pain...they've taken lots of x-rays and can't see which tooth is the problem. One day the pain will be centered around the back molar...the next day it will be the tooth in front of the one that was extracted....all I know is that I'm in a lot of pain and it's getting really old! It's mind-numbing.

Torched

MOSCOW (Reuters) - A woman set fire to her ex-husband's penis as he sat naked watching television and drinking vodka, Moscow police said Wednesday.
Asked if the man would make a full recovery, a police spokeswoman said it was "difficult to predict."
The attack climaxed three years of acrimonious enforced co-habitation. The couple divorced three years ago but continued to share a small flat, something common in Russia where property costs are very high.
"It was monstrously painful," the wounded ex-husband told Tvoi Den newspaper. "I was burning like a torch. I don't know what I did to deserve this."

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Is he serious?!? Really?? He has no clue what he did to deserve being flambe'd? I don't speak Russian, but I have a Doctorate in Fed-up Female. Just reading the article pissed me off. Let's give him a couple of clues as to why his ex-wife would torch his crotch....# 1: your naked-stinky-hairy-ass is sitting on furniture that she will not be able to bring herself to sit on ever again...(I know I'm assuming, but it just makes sense)....# 2: You are divorced...do you really think your ex wants to see you naked EVER AGAIN?!?...# 3: She told you Irina & Olga were coming over for borscht & bagels and you refused to get your naked-stinky-hairy-ass out of the livingroom & watch the tv in your pig-sty of a bedroom....what other choice did she have? I bet this woman finds jail to be a vacation!