Saturday, October 22, 2005

Shaved Leg

There is a rule in the universe that I am not allowed to get normal/typical/run-of-the-mill health problems. Nope...I'm only allowed to get weird/puzzling/odd health stuff. Like a year ago when I had allergies that turned into the sinus infection from hell which then had nowhere to go but out my eardrum. Even though my nose was open for business.....nope, had to blow the eardrum and ooze outta my head through my ear!

If my leg was shaved I would have a picture taken of what I'm dealing with now. Since my legs are part sasquatch you ain't gonna see it...you'll have to believe me and settle for my riveting description. I have, in Dr. Gleason's words a....hold on.....have to ask Butchy, I always call it the wrong thing.....infra-patellar-mass. What this means in my terms is a big ol fat swollen pillow below my left knee. To add to the conundrum that is my body....it's painful as all get out. The mass thing isn't painful....just the whole area to the left of it is painful to the touch and even when it's not being touched. It hurt so bad while the Dr was raising my pant leg that I pulled my pants down in front of him....I just don't do that, girls! I require yards of fabric, all medical personnel out of the room while the pants are lowering and won't allow them back in until I'm all covered up and tucked in....

The Doc is stumped, Butchy (who knows oodles about medical stuff and old people ailments....I'm almost 40 now, I qualify!) hasn't any idea....I haven't talked to my Mama yet....she's pretty in-the-know about health stuff....haven't gotten her diagnosis, yet. Yesterday was spent at the Dr...then getting an ultrasound on my "mass"...then waiting an hour for my x-rays. (The gal driving my wheelchair forgot to tell them I was waiting for my x-rays)

Oh, yeah. Wheelchair....I can barely walk on that leg. Painful to walk on....also painful when not walking on it. I finally broke down and went to the Doc cuz I was sleeping in about 1 hour increments....if that. This thing is really painful! I would wish it on my worst enemy....I'll have to check my files and see who that is.

We should be getting my test results back by this coming Weds.....I'll let y'all know what it is that has invaded my leg. Have any of y'all heard of anything like this? It's not in a joint....it's not water....there's no external sign of injury....in fact, the last time I injured this knee was last T-giving and, as far as I know, that healed up ages ago.

One very good thing about all this....the drugs! Love hydrocodone! If I keep typing it's gonna start sounding even more nonsensical than it already does....drugs are kicking in. Aaaaaahhhhhh.....off to la-la land.


Blogger ~Dawn declared....

hydrocodone- makes me itch big time, I hate that drug

10/22/2005 8:41 PM  
Blogger Alekx declared....

I'm having enough issues with perscription medication. Remember I'm out scoring on the street corner which is why I popped positive on my drug test

10/23/2005 10:46 AM  
Blogger Burfica declared....

I have bad leg problems with the lymphadema. My calves are bigger than my thighs they are so big. I feel your pain girlie. Hope you figure it out soon.

I guess an alien could be nesting in there. I would like to see what it looks like when it comes out. Pictures hehehehehe

10/23/2005 4:50 PM  

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