Monday, June 20, 2005

Kitten Ass vs Penises (or penes if you're a dork)

Kittens are very focused on having their butts admired. Y'all know what I'm talking about....you have a kitten climbing all over you, more often than not, their butt is right there smack dab in your face.
"Love my butt! Smell my butt! Worship my butt! Wanna closer look?"
The little fuzzy darlings are all about their stinky butts. You may be lucky and get a few cute little head-rubbies....but, after that it's all kitten ass.

Staring into BB's ass...for the gazillionth time....I realized that it was reminding me of something. Something from my distant past.....niggling at the corners of my mind....there on the tip of my conehead....then like a warningless kitten fart (where's a foghorn when you need it?), it hit me!

In another lifetime I lived with a penis-owner. Or, to be more exact...I lived with a penis-slave. We often refer to these poor penis-submissive beings as men. The one I was with didn't quite reach manhood in the maturity department. He was 28 going on 10....that's in "man years"...in "woman years" that would be 28 going on 4. The "penis" still wet the bed for rubber sheet's sake! (alcoholics have all the fun)

So, what does kitten ass and penises have in common? They are both in your face...a lot! (if the penis-slave has his way) Think about it....men love to show off their teeny-peenies.
"Love my penis! Kiss my penis! Worship my penis! Wanna closer look?"
It's kind of cute in a kitten...but, in a man? I'm thinking, "not so much!" And what is it with that helicopter move they do?!?!? Are they really thinking that it's a turn-on for us to watch that thing flipping around like a fish out of water? Puhhhh...leeeeeze!

No wonder I'm gay.


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